After what felt like an eternity, Wang Gaozhan finally spoke again.
His voice was rough and strained, as if something was stuck in his throat, making it weak and husky. He managed to force out only four words after several attempts: "What do you mean?"
"Did you know Han Songshan is dead?" He Chuan Zhou said. "Wang Yifei went to the crime scene. It was around one in the morning. The police have made him the primary suspect. He might have thought the killer was you, so he confessed to the murder himself. Now he's missing."
Wang Gaozhan unconsciously picked at his fingers, where scars from his recent work had yet to form scabs. As he picked, fine lines of blood began to seep out.
He seemed lost, his remaining spark of life like a charred shell about to collapse. He repeated, "What do you mean?"
"Wang Yifei suddenly showed up at the crime scene. There were witnesses who saw him in the residential area near the highway... He confessed to the murder." He Chuan Zhou's nose twitched as she tried to remain calm, "He's sick and refuses treatment. I hope we can find him quickly and get him to a hospital."
Wang Gaozhan looked blank, unable to grasp the full meaning of these simple sentences. He spoke slowly, "Zheng Xianwen doesn't have a phone."
“Friends and family had grown wary of his lies. After Zheng Jinmei died, he had no one else to contact. After several years in prison, phone technology had advanced and costs had risen too quickly for him to keep up, so he never bought one and borrowed mine when he needed to.”
“Recently, Zheng Xianwen had contacted Han Songshan, saying he had something to take care of. He borrowed my phone and only returned it a few days ago.”
He Chuan Zhou said, "Alright."
She responded softly, but her emotions were strained. She leaned her forehead against the steering wheel, overwhelmed by a mix of sorrow and relief. Finally able to calm down, she took a deep breath. Her uneven breathing could even be heard over the air conditioning, which soon turned into the sound of sniffling.
"Why?" She couldn't help but ask, "Why did you know Zheng Xianwen? Why did you separate from Yifei?"
It was only then that Wang Gaozhan seemed to feel something. His eyes stared blankly, sweeping from her face to the window, watching the busy street outside.
After a long while, his eyelids grew heavy, and tears started to flow uncontrollably.
He forgot how to control his expression, the muscles at the corners of his mouth twitching slightly. He sat there, silently, expressionlessly, shedding tears.
The conflict with Wang Yifei had started when Han Songshan sent people to cause trouble in their neighborhood, pretending to be victims and shouting that Wang Gaozhan was a murderer who deserved to pay with his life.
The commotion alarmed the residents and the property management, and the landlord hurried over, demanding that they move out immediately.
They had few belongings, just two suitcases. But since they rented the place, Wang Yifei had bought many decorations and furniture, even a small bed and toys for the cat.
When the landlord threw their things out, some got broken due to rough handling.
The two of them squatted at the entrance of the building, sorting through their belongings. Curious residents gathered, forming a circle and shouting, their harsh words like knives.
Those piercing and humiliating gazes made him feel ashamed. Wang Gaozhan couldn't refute them and pretended not to hear.
He had never felt this embarrassment before, even though he had confessed to murder, stood trial, and undergone prison reform for over a decade. Now that Wang Yifei had to endure this with him, even under the scorching sun, he felt a cold, sinking feeling.
He felt as if he was submerged below the ocean, carrying a massive iceberg on his back. The undercurrent chased him, and he swam desperately, hoping to get Wang Yifei away as quickly as possible.
They quickly packed up and left the neighborhood with their bags.
Wang Yifei, deeply affected, appeared dejected. Wang Gaozhan followed behind, unsure how to comfort him.
After walking a kilometer, the prickling sensation lessened, and they sat on the steps of a small flower bed to rest.
Wang Yifei, who had been silent all the way, forced a smile and complained, "I really liked that glass ornament of the dancing couple. It's gone now."
"Ah..." Wang Gaozhan mumbled. The ornament was heavy and had a broken corner. In his haste to leave, he had thrown it in the trash.
Guiltily, he said, "I'll go back and get it later."
Wang Yifei's smile was strained, "Forget it. I'll buy another one."
After a while, he added, "Not now, though. We have no place to put it, so don't bother."
Wang Gaozhan reached into a bag to check their belongings. His hands trembled as he rearranged a few items.
Wang Yifei grabbed his wrist, "Don't look."
Feeling guilty, Wang Gaozhan said, "Dad caused you trouble."
"It's okay," Wang Yifei replied quickly, "I'm used to it."
Wang Gaozhan's expression grew even more despondent. He searched for words but found none.
Wang Yifei said, "I'm sorry, Dad."
"It was my fault for provoking Han Songshan. I embarrassed him at work, and he wanted revenge," Wang Yifei said. "He didn't recognize me at first."
Wang Gaozhan looked up, managing to say, "It's okay."
Silence fell.
Wang Gaozhan stared into the distance, the sensation of Wang Yifei holding his wrist making him feel as if he was still shackled, without the freedom to look forward to a new future.
"Dad, can I ask you something?" Wang Yifei cautiously asked, moving closer. "Why did you kill someone?"
Wang Gaozhan had practiced this self-reflection countless times, waiting for Wang Yifei to ask. Though the timing wasn't ideal—they weren't alone and couldn't have a focused conversation—he spoke without thinking, recounting the events smoothly.
Over the years, the story had lost its anger and resentment, along with any self-justification. He restrained himself from showing the malice of the incident to avoid passing on the pain.
His wife had been assaulted on the road by several men, one of whom filmed the attack. The ringleader, a minor, received only a light punishment.
Later, his wife couldn't bear the psychological trauma and committed suicide. The main perpetrator showed no remorse, and upon hearing his taunts, Wang Gaozhan killed him.
This objective account did not have the desired effect; Wang Yifei's expression grew sadder.
In a near-whisper, Wang Gaozhan said, "I hesitated. I didn't want to do it. I needed to take care of you... But I was her husband first, your father second. I had to protect her. So I couldn't stop myself."
After hearing this, Wang Yifei simply said, "Oh." Then he hugged him tightly, resting his head on his shoulder, sobbing but resolute, "Dad, it's okay. We can start over. I know you're not a bad person."
He said this then, but he changed his mind the next day.