He Chuan Zhou settled into the car, fastened her seatbelt, and inserted the key into the ignition, but didn’t start the car right away. Instead, she took out her phone and opened the app, finding Wang Yifei’s account.
She scrolled to the earliest video and hit play.
In the enclosed space, the sound coming from the speakers was especially clear, making it feel as though the anxious Wang Yifei was right in front of her.
He was filming his computer and keyboard, shyly saying, “Hi everyone, this is my first time trying this. The internet cafe guy showed me how to do it.”
He panned the camera around the room. The phone’s low resolution and his unsteady hand revealed an old internet cafe.
He picked up the bag next to him, a well-worn companion since his third year of middle school.
“Heading out to do some drawing.”
In the early days, Wang Yifei made money through odd jobs, like working as a temp for courier services or as a kitchen hand for hotel banquets. He later started drawing, which was less stable income-wise, but much more enjoyable.
Today was a good day, he said. From 8 AM to 5 PM, three people had asked him to draw portraits, and he sold two landscape paintings.
For lunch, he spent four yuan on a bowl of sticky rice from a street vendor, and planned to head back to the internet cafe before nightfall.
He passed by a university and couldn’t resist taking a stroll through the campus.
There was a clear, winding creek by the teaching building.
Standing on the bridge, Wang Yifei tapped the railing with his hand and made a feeding motion. Quickly, fish gathered below, forming golden swarms under the bridge.
Looking at the camera, he suddenly said, “I’m so jealous.”
No one knew what he was envious of.
Just as He Chuan Zhou was about to play the next video, Zhou Tuoxing called.
For some reason, He Chuan Zhou felt an intense reluctance to communicate. She didn’t want to talk, so she hung up and texted him, saying she was about to drive home and couldn’t talk on the phone.
Then she turned the key and drove off.
She focused more than usual on the road to avoid drifting off into thoughts of Wang Yifei’s whereabouts. Near her neighborhood, she saw a familiar pancake stall at the corner and pulled over.
She remembered the day Wang Yifei had come to find her, holding a pancake.
She took out her phone and couldn’t resist opening Wang Yifei’s account again.
The latest video showed him buying a pancake by the roadside.
He pointed to the toppings on the table, saying, “I’ll have all of them.”
While waiting for the pancake to be cooked, he said, “My sister can’t finish a whole one. I usually ask the vendor to cut it in half, then we share.”
Returning to City A after seven years had given him a bit of confidence, making him chatty.
“I really like pancakes. I prefer them with sweet and spicy sauce, but my sister likes ketchup, so I’m fine with that too.”
He reminded the vendor, “Please cut it in half.”
The vendor packed the halves into two bags and handed them to him. Wang Yifei politely said, “Thank you.”
Perhaps finding the voice familiar, the vendor looked up and asked, “Wang... Yifei? Is that your name?”
Wang Yifei froze, his outstretched hand suspended in the air.
Luckily, the vendor didn’t say anything hurtful, just wiped his apron and smiled, “Did you go to school? Haven’t seen you in a while. You used to buy from me all the time, remember? Now we have a shop.”
Wang Yifei stammered, “Really?”
Feeling insincere, he added, “That’s great. Congratulations.”
This made the vendor a bit awkward, but Wang Yifei quickly took the bags and left.
He Chuan Zhou understood his fear and embarrassment.
When she first entered the police academy, she was afraid that someone would point at her and say, "Your father is a murderer. How can you be a cop?"
Defending herself felt futile, and ignoring the accusations was distressing, leaving her helpless and clinging to her fragile dignity as she fled.
Wang Yifei had heard similar accusations countless times, facing exclusion, bullying, and contempt throughout his life. His name had nearly become a nightmare for him.
Back in City A, he didn’t want to hear that name again.
He Chuan Zhou checked the comments on the video. Wang Yifei had commented, “It wasn’t very tasty once it got cold.”
He must have eaten it alone on the balcony after visiting Zhou Tuoxing’s house.
A pang of sadness and a chill filled He Chuan Zhou’s heart once more.
If she had returned earlier, Wang Yifei wouldn’t have had to wait six hours at the door.
Back then, she had casually told Wang Yifei that if Wang Gaozhan was released, they could move somewhere where no one knew them and live a peaceful life.
Wang Yifei had asked if he could come back if his father wasn’t a good person. He Chuan Zhou had said yes.
Reality wasn’t so kind.
She got out of the car, walked to the stall, and said, “I’ll have everything.”
Watching the vendor pour the batter, she added, “With sweet and spicy sauce. Cut in half.”
The vendor had a good memory and looked at her, “He Chuan Zhou? Is that you? Buying for Yifei?”
He Chuan Zhou wasn’t sure if she nodded, her body felt out of control.
“You still like these pancakes, huh?” The vendor was friendlier with her, as they often ran into each other, “You bought one for Yifei the first time, remember? You two used to come here all the time.”
She remembered. When Wang Yifei first came to their house, she ran to buy him a pancake for five yuan.
She took the bags, not wanting to eat or go home. She got back in the car, changed direction, and decided to find Wang Gaozhan.
.
The small noodle shop was cheap, attracting many workers during meal times, and only quieting down around 2 PM. Wang Gaozhan was sitting at the entrance, eating a bowl of noodles, sweat dripping from his forehead. He had to support his back with his left hand while eating, clearly struggling with the job’s demands.
He Chuan Zhou walked past him and asked the boss, who was sitting by the fan, “Does this job include food and lodging?”
The boss looked up, surprised, “Meals, yes. But we’re not hiring.”
She pointed back, “When did that man start working here?”
“Huh? Last week,” the boss paused his ginger slicing, eyeing her suspiciously, “Why? Who are you?”
Ignoring his question, she pressed on, “What date last week?”
“The 15th. Someone referred him,” the boss eyed her warily, “Who are you, anyway? Why do people keep looking for him? Is he in trouble?”
“No trouble.” She took out her phone, “If he needs help, call this number.”
She turned and found herself face-to-face with Wang Gaozhan’s unflinching gaze.
She sat across from him, noting his weary appearance, his hands trembling as he held the chopsticks, and asked, “Did you get paid for your labor in prison?”
Wang Gaozhan kept his head down, his smile bitter and forced, showing only the wrinkles on his face, “I have no son now. I need to save for my old age.”
“Did Zheng Xianwen scam you? Where is he? Do you get your own wages?”
Wang Gaozhan stirred his noodles with the chopsticks, muttering, “I’m not that foolish.”
He Chuan Zhou initially intended to ask Wang Gaozhan about Wang Yifei’s whereabouts, but seeing him eating his noodles, she decided against it. She pulled out a card from her bag and placed it on the table. “This is the money Yifei saved for you over many years. Don’t give it to Zheng Xianwen. He’s not reliable.”
Wang Gaozhan glanced at the card, pausing for a few seconds, but he didn’t reach for it and continued eating his noodles.
Ten years ago, He Chuan Zhou couldn’t understand the look in his eyes, and she still couldn’t now.
Perhaps he was entangled in his own web of confusion.
He Chuan Zhou asked, “Do you know what illness he has?”
Wang Gaozhan shook his head, seemingly focused on his bowl of noodles, not noticing that the soft noodles had been broken into pieces by his chopsticks and had turned mushy.
He Chuan Zhou sat quietly, realizing that her presence might be a torment to him. She stood up and said, “If you find out where he is, please let me know.”
Leaving the noodle shop, she walked around the crime scene.
Many police officers were searching along the road for the murder weapon and bloodied clothes. Vehicles couldn’t get through. He Chuan Zhou didn’t want to be stopped at the roadblock, so she took a detour home.
When she finally parked, she noticed several missed calls from Zhou Tuoxing on her phone.
It was already late, the sunset’s afterglow hanging in the sky, partially obscured by the city’s tall buildings, leaving only a dim, faint light.
He Chuan Zhou took the pancake from the passenger seat and sat on the bench downstairs, unwrapping it and taking a bite of the now cold pancake.
It indeed wasn’t very tasty.
The oppressive heat of late spring and early summer lingered in the air, mingling with the noisy sounds from the nearby residential buildings, making it hard to breathe.
Suddenly, the streetlights came on, casting a beam of light from above.
He Chuan Zhou finally tasted something, but it wasn’t the flavor of the sauce, it was a faintly bitter taste.
As her mind wandered, she noticed the sudden quietness around her. Strange thoughts began to emerge.
If she hadn’t been so reluctant to let He Xu go, perhaps Wang Yifei would still be in City A, studying peacefully, preparing for college, and waiting for Wang Gaozhan’s release.
Instead of hiding, heartbroken and unable to confide in anyone, he was now lost and missing.
These thoughts were wrong and meaningless, but they were so beautiful that once they started, they continued uncontrollably.
Until hurried footsteps approached, breaking her unrealistic fantasies.
Zhou Tuoxing hurried over, and upon seeing her, his anger dissipated significantly. Still, he asked sternly, “Where have you been this afternoon? Didn’t you say you were going home? Your precinct called me but didn’t explain clearly. What happened?”
He Chuan Zhou looked at him for a long moment before saying with difficulty, “I’m wondering if I’m very selfish.”
Zhou Tuoxing didn’t understand, his brows furrowing in worry as he walked closer, bending down and asking gently, “Did someone scold you?”
He Chuan Zhou didn’t reply, so Zhou Tuoxing tried to comfort her, “Don’t pay attention to them. Nowadays, many people judge you harshly without knowing you, based on a few words, deciding you’re unforgivable and thoroughly evil, as if they are absolutely right…”
He knelt down, trying to take the pancake from her hands. He tugged, but she didn’t let go. He looked up, stunned, and gently wiped her face with his thumb.
She felt a cool sensation, and there was a blur of white light in her vision.
Zhou Tuoxing wiped her face again and, finally unsure what else to do, pulled her into his arms.